RETIREMENT ISSUES

If we believe the popular media, retirement issues involve only golf and financial planning.  However, I see many other issues that surface when a person retires from an active work life.  First of all, it is now well recognized that the worst advice ever given to older adults was “retire at 65 and then you don’t have to do anything.”  Unfortunately, many older adults took this advice to heart and retired and did nothing…….for 20 or 30 years. I saw a lot of them when I worked in the nursing home. We now know that one key to a successful retirement stage of life is to keep active. 

My advice for anyone in their late 40’s or early 50’s is to take a good look at your life and figure out how satisfied you are with how you are living.  Is your life balanced between work and play?  Have you developed spiritual resources that will get you through the hard times?  What is the state of your relationships with various people, family included?  How is your diet?  What is the level of exercise or activity in your life?  Is there some unanswered yearning that you have about travel?  Creative expression?  Desire to give back?  It is never too late to make changes and start a new course to prepare for the later stages of life.  Today we are overwhelmed with self-help books on just about any topic you can imagine.  They can be a good start.  We have incredible technology to help us explore.  Generally, people are healthier today than they have been in the past.  There are more activities and resources one can avail themselves of than ever before.  Don’t just let life happen, make some choices about it. 

Toward the close of one’s life, if not before, you will want to answer three questions. 

1. Who Am I?
2. Why am I here?
3. What is my purpose?

It is never too late or too early to start trying to find the answers to these questions.  The journey to find the answers will incredibly enrich your life and open many opportunities to you.  Some of these opportunities come in the form of challenges.  All will provide inner growth and spiritual development.

While it is true that financial planning is important to be able to afford the style of retirement living you want, it is not the end-all or be-all that is hyped to us.  While having enough money to afford to live is important, we are too indoctrinated to believe that means having lots of stuff.  Most of us can live quite happily and simply by focusing more on the intangibles and less on the material possessions in our lives.  No amount of stuff is going to give us peace of mind and peace of mind is the greatest achievement anyone can realize.

Rarely in retirement planning do you hear anyone mention spiritual and emotional growth.  Retirement can be a stage of unparalleled growth and self-discovery.  I encourage you to do your homework early and search out those meaningful paths that lead to self-fulfillment and joy in life.  Volunteering is one avenue to pursue.  Leading a more reflective, spiritual mode of living is another.  Healing relationships and having closure on unhappy experiences can provide much inner growth and soothe the soul.  Becoming involved in something bigger than you will broaden your world and allow you to continue to contribute to life.  Search out something that makes you feel good at the end of the day and you will find that life will continue to be joyful and fulfilling.  There is an old Hindu teaching that basically says, “When you were born, you cried and others rejoiced.  Live your life so that at the end, you are rejoicing and others are crying.”

Speaking of the end of life, that is a part of retirement and preparing for that time can be very special.  Hopefully, you have practiced forgiveness and healed relationships, answered the big 3 questions and have achieved peace of mind.  One last item is to make sure that all of the necessary paperwork is done.  Clean out and throw out old junk (including unnecessary paperwork), don’t leave it for your caregiver to do.  Pare down to the basics and it is never too early to start.  Organize your financial and insurance information and make sure that your caregiver knows where to find the information they might need to take care of you in case you can’t take care of yourself.  It is very important to complete your Advance Directives so your caregiver will know how you want to end your life if you are not able to communicate your wants.  Take care of your burial or cremation arrangements so that your children will not have to do so.  Most importantly, let the people in your life know that you love them and always have.  Too many times that is left unsaid.  I have heard too many adult children say that their father or mother never told them that they were loved.   

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